Destroy That Digimon!
by The Experimental Film
Summary: Okay, this fic is basically a game show, run by Brock, where everything is geared at killing Digimon. You probably shouldn't read it if you like Digimon. But then again, not many people do.
1. Destroy That Digimon!

Destroy That Digimon!  
A gameshow hosted by the one and only Brock! 

Disclaimer: THIS SPACE FOR RENT  
Summary: Brock hosts a gameshow, whose one and only purpose is to say one and only a lot! (and also to destroy Digimon)

It's the one and only beginning!  
Brock straightened his one and only top hat. He pulled his one and only tie. He ripped the words 'one' and 'only' from HyperMew's dictionary. Then he started the show.  
BROCK: Okay, guys, here's the point of this show. We're trying to destroy Digimon. And now, let's begin!!!!!  
The curtain opens. Inside there's a long passageway lit with torches. There's also a chair with what looks like a high-tech overhead in front of it.  
BROCK: Our first contestant is…Matt!!!!  
Matt comes up the passageway.  
MATT: Huh? What's going on?  
BROCK: Sit in the chair and write your name.  
Matt's sloppy signature: MaTt#$!!!!  
BROCK: Now, Matt, what you have to do is answer a question. If you get it right, you get a prize. If you don't, I'm going to have to pull this string! (nods vigorously at a string dangling behind him)  
MATT: Okay!  
BROCK: Just a sec. (pushes button and the overhead thingie sinks into the floor) Okay. First Question: What three things involved with Pokemon that are totally useless, and all start with M?  
MATT: Metapod, Magikarp, and Mr. Emerid!  
BROCK: Correct! Shoot…  
Brock pulls the string anyway. A ten foot Hershey bar falls on Matt's head and breaks in half.  
MATT: Yum!  
BROCK: Keep going till you miss! Next question: If you could strangle Ash with a doughnut, what would you do?  
A. Lock James and Ash in the same room  
B. Lock HyperMew and Ash in the same room  
C. Eat a doughnut  
D. Ponder the meaning of life  
MATT: Uhhh…C!  
BROCK: Wrong! (yay)  
Brock pulls the string and a wheelbarrow falls on Matt's head, and breaks in half.  
MATT: Yum!  
BROCK: What?!?! You call that a  
PUNISHMENT?  
He pulls the string again and HyperMew falls on top of him. Then HyperMew turns him into a rubber chicken.  
HYPERMEW: Yay! I've always wanted a rubber chicken!  
BROCK: Next contestant is…Lopmon!  
LOPMON: Hi!  
BROCK: Write your name on the-(looks around) Hey, where'd the hi-tech overhead thingie go?  
The hi-tech overhead thingie rises out of the ground.  
BROCK: Write your name.  
Lopmon's signature: Lopmon is great.  
BROCK: What? You aren't great! Lemme see that…  
Brock's Lopmon's signature: Lopmon is a long-eared freak!  
LOPMON: What a party pooper.  
BROCK: Shut up. Question Number One: What is HyperMew's last name?  
A. Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious  
B. Antidisestablishmentarianism (that's actually the right way to spell it!)  
C. Sotashi  
D. Satoshi  
LOPMON: D!  
BROCK: Final answer?  
LOPMON: Lifeline!  
BROCK: Ugh. Uhhh…A…or D?  
LOPMON: A!  
BROCK: Final answer?  
LOPMON: I wanna ask the audience!  
AUDIENCE: Beep Boop Beep (they tap out their answers on the button doohickey)  
BROCK: It says: Answer D: 99.9 and 999,999/1,000,000  
Answer A: 1/1,000,000  
LOPMON: A!  
BROCK: Final answer?  
LOPMON: Call a friend.  
BROCK: (sighing) Who do you want to call?  
LOPMON: Bob the Builder!  
BOB THE BUILDER ON THE TELEPHONE: Hi, Lopmon! I just got a tattoo! It says The author of this fanfic is a lunatic! on my shoulder now!  
BROCK: You have 30 seconds.  
LOPMON: Waazup?  
BOB THE BUILDER ON THE TELEPHONE: Waazup? 21…20…19  
LOPMON: What's 22?  
BOB THE BUILDER ON THE TELEPHONE: 93! 12…11…10  
LOPMON: Thanks! (hangs up)  
LOPMON: Ninety-three!  
BROCK: Wrong. The answer was twenty-one, but the correct answer was seven.  
.dnaL sdrawkcaB ,dnaL sdrawkcaB (gnigins) :NOMPOL  
Brock pulls a string and a bunch of fanfics (all written by yours truly) fall on Lopmon's head.  
LOPMON: Ha ha! That didn't hurt!  
A two-ton grizzly bear falls on Lopmon's head.  
TWO-TON GRIZZLY BEAR: (eats Lopmon, then takes off his skin) I'm T.K., the next contestant!  
BROCK: But the next contestant is Antylamon.  
T.K.: (proudly) I ate him!  
BROCK: Oh, all right. Write your name.  
T.K.'s signature: your name  
Brock whacks himself in the forehead.  
BROCK: What should the country be doing right now?  
A. Dancing  
B. Dancing  
C. Dancing  
D. Flubbing  
T.K.: Lifeline! 50-50!  
BROCK: A or C?  
T.K.: Uh, C!  
BROCK: Correct! Next question: If Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled lemons, and Lindsey Lemons picked a peck of pickled peppers, and Austin Apples picked a peck of pickled potatoes, and Patsy Potatoes picked a peck of Swedish Hairballs, and they all took their stock to market, and Peter and Lindsey sold the same amount, and Austin sold two more than them and three times as much as Patsy, and Patsy sold one, and she sold that to the cat who was at the end of the line for Swedish Fish and didn't get one, how many teeth would the Great Emperor of China have after he was kicked in the gut?  
T.K.: Ninety-three!  
BROCK: Hee hee hee.  
T.K.: Oh, shoot! I'm wrong, right?  
Brock nods.  
BROCK: Yep!  
T.K.: (sighs) Oh well…  
BROCK: (pulls string) Bye Bye!  
T.K.: Hey, my chair is falling! (jumps up and somehow lands safely. His chair, however, is not so lucky) Hey-OUCH! Heeeeeellllllppppppp!!!!!!!!! (Ash has just jabbed him in the rear end with a cattle prod)  
BROCK: (sighs) It was over so quickly. Oh well. Our next contestant is…Kari!  
Kari walks up the passageway.  
KARI: Oh no…  
BROCK: Sit down.  
Kari sits reluctantly.  
BROCK: Write your name.  
Kari's signature: Kari. The dame of the Digi-Destined.  
BROCK: Hey! Lemme fix that.  
Brock's Kari's signature: Kari. The loser of the Digi-Destined.  
BROCK: I like doing that!  
Kari shrugs.  
BROCK: 'Kay, you moron. Question number one: What is 15 x 15?  
KARI: 225…  
BROCK: Uhhh…Oh! You're right! Ash, zap her!  
Ash pokes her with the cattle prod.  
KARI: Hey! That hurt!  
ASH: (sticking out his tongue) Thhhppppttttt!!!!  
KARI: Why, oh why?  
BROCK: Because we all hate Digimon!  
KARI: WHAT?  
BROCK: We all hate Digimon!  
KARI: WHAT?  
BROCK: Someone whack her…  
ASH: Okay! (conks Kari on the head with the cattle prod)  
TEAM ROCKET: (appearing upon the scene) Hi, we were sent from the RBNWTFFSBS. Otherwise known as the Really Bad Nimrods Who Think FanFics Should Be Shortened. Anyway, the RBNWTFFSBS say that if ya don't close up this fic soon, their gonna:  
A. Shoot HyperMew.  
B. Shoot you.  
C. Shoot us.  
D. Close down this fanfic.  
BROCK: What? That's crazy! They wouldn't- 


	2. Destroy That Digimon 2!

Destroy That Digimon 2  
We're back! 

Disclaimer: Knock Knock. Who's there? Nobody. Nobody who? Nobody who? Oh well…  
Summary: None. Ha ha!  
Dedication: This story is dedicated to the old PinkScyther. The one who didn't like Digimon… or was named "Sk8er Grl"…So I beat her up in this story! Serves her right!

Slowking Studios proudly presents:  
BROCK: Welcome back to Destroy That Digimon 2! Our current contestant is Kari! Let's begin!  
BROCK: Question #1: Who the heck is Qwerty Yuiop?  
KARI: (bored) HyperMew's computer.  
BROCK: Geez! Correct. Next Question: "What song do the lyrics: Five Golden Retrievers, Four Collie Dogs, Three French Poodles, Two Great Danes, and a Schnauzer With A Goatee" come from?  
KARI: The Twelve Dogs of Christmas.  
BROCK: What about: "Five Flannel Shirts, Four Sigma Tires, Three Shotgun Shells, Two Hunting Dogs, and some Parts Of A Mustang GT"?  
KARI: The Twelve Days of Redneck Christmas.  
BROCK: Wrong! The Twelve Redneck Days of Christmas! Die! (pulls string. Five flannel shirts, four sigma tires, three shotgun shells, two hunting dogs, and some parts of a Mustang GT fall on Kari's head. She is really most sincerely dead)  
BROCK: Our next contestant is…Sk8er Grl! Uh oh.  
Sk8er Grl comes up the dark tunnel.  
SK8ER GRL: Brockie!  
HYPERMEW: Die! Die! Die! (shoves wad of Digimon cards down Sk8er Grl's throat) Yahhhh! Yahhhh!  
SG: Owie! (slumps over. The circus float that HM was supposed to build in science but turned out to look more like a drag racer speeds up and takes her to a hospital)  
HM: Who let that in here?  
ONE MILLION SG FANS: We did.  
HM: It was a rhetorical question.  
OMSGF: Oh. Sorry.  
BROCK: Who's next? (checks schedule) Ah, Megadramon.  
MEGADRAMON: Roar.  
BROCK: Write your name.  
Megadramon's signature on thin air because HM forgot to make the overhead thingie rise up again: megadramon  
BROCK: What are the top 3 shows (for all ages) that are on Taliban TV Network?  
MEGADRAMON: Talitubbies, (A/N Tally-Wally, Beardsy, Turban, Poop!), Who's Machine Gun is it Anyway?, and Afghanistan's Bloodiest Home Videos.  
BROCK: pulls string anyway. The Talitubbies fall on Megadramon's head  
MEGADRAMON: Aaaaaaahhhhhhhh! It's something that even remotely resembles Telitubbies! Run for your life!  
BROCK: That's the best punishment yet! (Megadramon skedaddles) Next contestant… Tracy! Wait a minute…  
TRACY: Hi!  
BROCK: Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhh! I mean, since when is he a Digimon?  
ASH: (who has been sitting behind the chair the hole time, picking his toenails) (pulls out Dexter)  
DEXTER: Tracymon. The scary Digimon. Will eat anything that tries to catch it. Has recently consumed Matt, Kari, and Hamtaro.  
ASH: Hamtaro tried to capture it?  
TRACYMON: He didn't taste very good…  
ASH & BROCK: Ah.  
TRACYMON: Can I write my name?  
BROCK: (high-tech overhead thingie rises out of the ground) Uh, sure.  
Tracymon's signature: Traceymon  
BROCK: Um…(high-tech overhead thingie goes back into the ground) Okay… Question number one! What was Ash's snorlax eating when Ash first saw him?  
A. Apples  
B. Grapefruit  
C. Oranges  
D. HyperMew's rubber ducky  
TRACYMON: Mickey Mouse!  
BROCK: (sweatdrops) I need a break…  
HAMTARO: (comes in) I'll fill in!  
BROCK: (turns purple and makes Bugs Bunny train sounds) Aaaaaaaahhhhhhh! (runs away screaming)  
HAMTARO: What's with him? (A/N: What was with him? Someone give me a good answer in your review. You can be in my next game show fic! (Destroy that Digimon 3!))  
TRACYMON: I know my answer now! B! Grapefruit!  
HAMTARO: Correct! (pulls string anyway. A screwdriverhead shark falls on Tracymon's head)  
HYPERMEW: What's a screwdriverhead shark? Is it like a sears ultra shark? I hate that commercial…  
HAMTARO: COMMERCIAL BREAK!  
(Sears Brand Ultra Shark commercial comes on)  
HYPERMEW: Aaaaaah! (uses harry potter wand thingie to change the commercial to the J.C. Penney commercial) Aaaaaah! It's worse then I imagined!  
HAMTARO: End commercial break!  
TRACYMON: What's the next question?  
HAMTARO: What word perfectly describes you:  
A. Sketcher  
B. Smeargle  
C. Handsome  
D. Moron  
TRACYMON: C of course! I-(he is cut off by Hamtaro pulling the string. 5,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 sketchbooks fall on Tracymon's head. He's dead. Duh)  
HAMTARO: Lesse, Tracymon is gone, the next contestant is… I'm not spoiling the surprise! Anyway, I'd better leave. Brock would go insane if he came back and I was still here. Bye!  
BROCK: (enters) I'm back! Good, that rodent is gone…  
TEAM ROCKET: Hi!  
BROCK: (spins around) Yah! I thought you were at the RBS something.  
TEAM ROCKET: We quit! Now we work for the Even Worse People Who Want To Save Paper So They Try To Make FanFic Authors Write About Eight Thousand FanFics On 1 Page In Size 8. Loosely translated, we're from the EWPWWTSPSTTTMFFAWAETFFO1PIS8. And according to your contract, you need to put the next fanfic in this same story.  
BROCK:  
TEAM ROCKET: Good point. We were kidding. Bye!  
BROCK: (screen closes in leaving Brock going) Uh…

END!!

Well, that was okay. I got faster right at the end. I would've shown you his contract, but I'm supposed to get off the computer soon… Well, to be precise, five minutes ago. Anyway, 2 good reviews, 1 bad review (or good, I don't really care) and I'll begin. (drum roll here) Destroy that Digimon 3! (The first person that gives me good reviews gets to be on it! That should keep your spirits up!)

Bye!


End file.
